I remember the day I tore out this closet. I had been working on Eleanor’s house for 10 months, not getting any return on my investment. I was renovating on my own—unless you counted the help of my 2-year-old daughter—and I was tired. The project overwhelmed me. I had so many tasks I hadn’t touched yet. I felt I had achieved so little.
Tears wanted to form as I tried to ignore the tightness in my throat. “I can’t do this,” I told myself. “This is too hard,” I repeated over and over.
But for whatever reason, instead of letting the tears fall, I was abruptly reminded of the alternative. Sure, I could rid the pain and frustration right in front of me, but I would also have to let go of the dream I was pursuing. I would be putting an end to the things I had accomplished so far--despite how small they seemed that day--and I would likely find myself unsatisfied soon after giving up.
So I picked up the sledgehammer and started swinging. Swing after swing, the wall came down, and the room quickly transformed. The feelings that day didn’t stay away. I had to fight them repeatedly in the following 12 months, which it took to finish the remodel and list on Airbnb. Countless times, I wanted to spiral down the “I can’t do this” mindset and had to keep swinging, pushing the negativity away. And each time I did, I got closer to the finish line.
I was reminded of “the closet” when recently greeted by the words that haunted me that day. I felt it was time to share this story if someone needed the same redirection. Don’t kid yourself into thinking that you are the only one feeling discouraged. Or the only one that wants to give up. The only difference between you and the person achieving their goals is they refused to stop the spiral of negativity. It’s hard! It’s expected! But keep your CHIN UP!! Push through the doubt and plow ahead. Remind yourself of what the alternative looks like and how far you’ve come.
You can do this. It will be worth it.
Eleanor would be so proud of you.
I know I am.!
Lara